Strength

On June 14, I was diagnosed as having a stroke. Thirty six years old and I had a stroke! How strange. After 4 long, awful weeks of headaches, I think John and I were prepared for just about anything, but when we were told a stroke, it just about blew us away. I spent a week in the hospital making sure the swelling didn't reach my brain stem. Luckily, it didn't and I was able to come home. There have been many blessings in this whole process. MANY blessings. However, that is a long post and probably for another day when I can type better. The things that the stroke affected were: my balance, my short-term memory, and my fine motor skills. Some days my balance is better, some days it isn't. Some days I do really well in talking, some days I have to really concentrate on what I want to say in order to make sense. I haven't tried to sew yet, but typing and texting are skills that I am working on.
It is a frustrating process. A very slow process. Some days I do better than others. But each and every day I am reminded how lucky I am. I could be learning how to walk again, or to eat again, or to talk again. I could not know my family, my kids, myself. I came away from this relatively unscathed.....well, other than scared a little bit :)
I have incredible kids who are a major help to me. My family, who have been wonderful and, of course, John, who is my rock. But, I also find strength in strange ways. The other day, I was reminded of a talk given by Richard G. Scott. In it he said: "Fourteen years ago the Lord took my wife beyond the veil. I love her with all my heart, but I never have complained because I know it was His will. I have never asked why, but rather what is it that He wants me to learn from this experience." I know that many people think that they know what THEY think I need to learn, but I am trying to understand what it is my Father wants me to learn.
I also went to Toy Story 3 with the kids the other day. When Andy was cleaning out his room, the army guys say something like: "Let's face it, when the garbage bags come out, us army guys are the first ones to go." I thought, too often, I don't give value to the little things. So now, I have a plastic army guy sitting on my night stand, reminding me to look for the value in even the small things and not to hastily throw anything away.
Silly, I know, but sometimes, changes need to come. Hopefully, with each new day, I will get stronger and be able to do more for myself and my family. I am grateful for the people who are helping me until I am able to help myself. I have been blessed with angels!